Chapter 13 - The Life of St.Teresa of Jesus - Autobiography of St. Teresa of Avila

The Life of the Holy Mother
    Teresa of Jesus

   "The Life"

  The Life of St. Teresa of Jesus
of the Order of Our Lady of Carmel

    Chapter 13

She continues to
- treat of the first degree (of prayer), and
- gives advice with respect to certain temptations
     sometimes sent by Satan.
 This is most profitable.

- Of Certain Temptations of Satan.
- Instructions Relating Thereto.

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    Discussion Topics
    to keep in mind
    as we read along:

1). In the "early stages" of prayer,
what does St. Teresa advise?
[ Life: Ch. 13
   #1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 7, 8, 9, 17, 31, 32 ]
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1b). What does St. Teresa teach
about false humility?
[ Life: Ch. 13 # 5, 6 ]
_________________________

2). What instructions regarding
meditation topics
does St. Teresa give?
[ Life: Ch. 13
#3, 17, 19, 20, 21, 31, 32 ]
_________________________

3a). What advise does St.
Teresa give to those
"who make much use
of their understanding,
eliciting from one subject,
many thoughts and conceptions"?
[ Life: Ch. 13 # 17 ]
_________________________

3b). What advise does
St. Teresa give to those
who cannot "make much use
of their understanding, "?
[ Life: Ch. 13 # 16, 17 ]
__________________________

4. What are the temptations
which often attack beginners?
[ Life: Ch. 13
   # 5, 6, 9, 10, 11, 13, 14, 15 ]
___________________________

5). When St. Teresa discusses
the temptation by which
"persons are carried away
by a zeal for virtue,
through the pain which
the sight of the sins and failings
of others occasions them. " ?
What does she describe as
"the greatest evil of all"?
[ Life: Ch. 13 #14, 15 ]
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6). What does St. Teresa say "is
reason enough why
those who begin
do not attain more quickly
to great perfection"?

[ Life: Ch. 13 #8, 7 ]
[ Life: Ch 15: #17]
[ Life: Ch. 11: #22]
_____________________________

7). What does St. Teresa say
and advise about self-knowledge ?
[ Life: Ch. 13
# 1, 6, 7, 11, 14, 15, 23 ]
____________________________

8). Regarding the qualities
of a Spiritual Director,
what does St. Teresa advise?
[ Life: Ch. 13 # 24, 26, 27 ]
___________________________

9). What does St. Teresa
advise us regarding
"learned men, and
religious in particular" ?
[ Life: Ch. 13 #29, 30]
_____________________________

10). What did St. Teresa say
about anxieties regarding
our security or health
and their effect on prayer?
[Life:Ch. 13 # 6, 7, 8, 9, 10]
______________________________

Chapter 13

  - Of Certain Temptations of Satan.
  - Instructions Relating Thereto.

1. I have thought it right
- to speak of certain temptations
     I have observed
   to which beginners are liable--
      some of them I have had myself--and

- to give some advice about certain things
      which to me seem necessary.

In the beginning, then,
    we should strive
to be cheerful and unconstrained;

   for there are people who think
       it is all over with devotion
   if they relax themselves ever so little.

It is right to be afraid of self;
    so that, having no confidence in ourselves,
        much or little,
    we may not place ourselves
        in those circumstances
    wherein men usually sin against God;

    for it is a most necessary fear,
      till we become very perfect in virtue.

And there are not many
   who are so perfect
as to be able to relax themselves
   on those occasions
which offer temptations
    to their natural temper;

   for always while we live,
       were it only to preserve humility,
    it is well we should know
       our own miserable nature;

but there are many occasions
   on which it is permitted us--
       as I said just now [1]--
  to take some recreation,
       in order that we may
  with more vigour resume our prayer.

2. Discretion is necessary throughout.

We must have great confidence;
   because it is very necessary for us
    - not to contract our desires,
    - but put our trust in God;

   for, if we do violence to ourselves
       ( persevere in efforts to sacrifice
           or deny self )
       by little and little,
   we shall, though not at once,
      reach that height
    which many Saints by His grace
      have reached.

    If they (the Saints)
      - had never resolved to desire, and
      - had never by little and little
             acted upon that resolve,
     they never could have
             ascended to so high a state.

3. His Majesty seeks and loves
        courageous souls;
     but they must
        - be humble in their ways, and
        - have no confidence in themselves.

I never saw one of those
    lag behind on the road; and
never a cowardly soul,
     though aided by humility,
   make that progress
       in many years
which the former (courageous one)
       makes in a few.

I am astonished at the great things
    done on this road
by encouraging oneself
    to undertake great things,

though we may not have the strength
    for them at once;
the soul takes a flight upwards
    and ascends high,
though, like a little bird
    whose wings are weak,
it grows weary and rests.

4. At one time I used often to think
      of those words of St. Paul:
"That all things are possible in God." [2]

I saw clearly that
     of myself,
             I could do nothing.

This was of great service to me.

So also was the saying of St. Augustine:
     "Give me, O Lord,
         what Thou commandest, and
         command what Thou wilt." [3]

I was often thinking how St. Peter
    lost nothing by throwing himself into the sea,
    though he was afterwards afraid. [4]

These first resolutions are a great matter--
   although it is necessary in the beginning
      that we should be
       - very reserved,
       - controlled by the discretion and authority
             of a director (Confessor)
   but we must take care
     that he be one
         who does not teach us
             to crawl like toads,
         nor one who may be satisfied
           when the soul shows itself
             fit only to catch lizards.

Humility must always go before:
   so that we may know
      that this strength can come
   out of no strength of our own.

5. But it is necessary
        we should understand
  what manner of humility this should be,

   because Satan, I believe, does great harm;
      for he hinders those
             who begin to pray
         from going onwards,
      by suggesting to them
          false notions of humility.

 He makes them think it is pride
    - to have large desires,
    - to wish to imitate the Saints, and
    - to long for martyrdom.

 He tells us forthwith,
    or he makes us think,
  that the actions of the Saints
    - are to be admired,
    - not to be imitated,
   by us who are sinners.

 I, too, say the same thing;
   but we must see
       - what those actions are
             which we are to admire, and
       - what those are
             which we are to imitate;

    for it would be wrong in a person
       who is weak and sickly
          to undertake much fasting
            and sharp penances
          to retire into the desert,
             where he could not sleep,
              nor find anything to eat;
              or, indeed,
          to undertake any austerities
              of this kind.

6. But we ought to think
       that we can force ourselves,
           by the grace of God,
         - to hold the world in profound contempt-
         - to make light of honour, and
         - be detached from our possessions.

   Our hearts, however, are so mean
      that we think the earth would fail us
           under our feet,
      if we were to
          - cease to care even for a moment
                 for the body, and
          - give ourselves up to spirituality.

   Then we think
       that to have all we require
        (to have the necessities of life)
          - contributes to recollection,
          - because anxieties disturb prayer.

  It is painful to me that
     - our confidence in God is so scanty, and
     - our self-love so strong,
    as that any anxiety
        about our own necessities
    should disturb us.
   But so it is;

   for when our spiritual progress
      is so slight,
   a mere nothing
      will give us as much trouble
   as great and important matters
      will give to others.

   And we think ourselves spiritual!

7. Now, to me,
    this way of going on
       seems to betray a disposition
     to reconcile soul and body together,
       in order that
         - we may not miss our ease
                 in this world, and
         - yet have the fruition of God
                 in the next;

     and so it will be
        if we walk
              according to justice,
              clinging to virtue;
     but it is the pace of a hen--
     it will never bring us to liberty of spirit.

     It is a course of proceeding,
      as it seems to me,
     most excellent for those
        who are in the married state, and
         who must live according to their vocation;

  but for the other state,
     I by no means wish
   for such a method of progress,
   neither can I be made to believe
     it to be sound;

  for I have tried it,
    and I should have remained
         in that way,
    if our Lord in His goodness
        had not taught me
    another and a shorter road.

8. Though, in the matter of desires,
        I always had generous ones;
    but I laboured,
               as I said before, [5]
       - to make my prayer,
              and, at the same time,
       - to live at my ease.

   If there had been any one
      to rouse me to a higher flight,
   he might have brought me,
      I think,  to a state
      in which these desires
         might have had their effects;

  but, for our sins,
     so few and so rare are they
  whose discretion in that matter
     is not excessive.

  That, I believe, is
     reason enough why
         those who begin
            do not attain more quickly
                to great perfection;

   for our Lord never fails us,
     and it is not His fault;
   the fault and the wretchedness of this
      being all our own.

9. We may also imitate the Saints
       by striving after
         - solitude and
         - silence, and
         - many other virtues
       that will not kill these wretched bodies of ours,
           which insist on being treated so orderly,
       that they may disorder the soul; and

    Satan, too, helps much
         to make them unmanageable.
   When he sees us a little anxious
         about them,
           (anxious about our body and its needs)
         he wants nothing more to convince us
            that our way of life must kill us,
         and destroy our health;

    even if we weep,
         he makes us afraid of blindness.

  I have passed through this,
     and therefore I know it;
  but I know of no better sight or better health
      that we can desire,
  than the loss of both in such a cause.

  Being myself so sickly,
    I was always under constraint,
         and good for nothing,
   till I resolved to make no account
         of my body
         nor of my health;
    even now I am worthless enough.

10. But when it pleased God
      to let me find out this device of Satan,
 I used to say to the latter,
   when he suggested to me
         that I was ruining my health,
         - that my death was of no consequence;
    when he suggested rest,
I replied that
       - I did not want rest,
               but the Cross.

    His other suggestions
        I treated in the same way.

   I saw clearly that in most things,
        though I was really very sickly,
   it was either
        - a temptation of Satan, or
        - a weakness on my part.

   My health has been much better
       since I have ceased to look after
          my ease and comforts.

It is of great importance
    not to let our own thoughts frighten us
       in the beginning,
    when we set ourselves to pray.

Believe me in this, for I know it by experience.

As a warning to others,
    it may be that this story of my failures
may be useful.

11. There is another temptation,
           which is very common:
  when people begin to have pleasure in
       - the rest and
       - the fruit of prayer,
   they will have (want) everybody else
         to be very spiritual also.

   Now, to desire this is not wrong,
     but to try to bring it about may not be right,
  except with great discretion and
             with much reserve,
      without any appearance of teaching.

  He who would do any good in this matter
     ought to be endowed with solid virtues,
  that he may not put temptation
     in the way of others.

It happened to me--
     that is how I know it--
  when,
            as I said before, [6]
         I made others apply themselves to prayer,
     to be a source of temptation and disorder;

   for, on the one hand,
      they heard me say great things
           of the blessedness of prayer,
   and, on the other,
     (they) saw how poor
           I was in virtue,
         notwithstanding my prayer.

   They had good reasons on their side,
       and afterwards they told me of it;
   for they knew not
       how these things could be compatible
          one with the other.

  This it was that made them
      not to regard that as evil
   which was really so  (evil) in itself,
      namely,
          that they saw me do it myself,
               now and then,
      during the time
          that they thought well of me
                in some measure.
      (Since they considered her to be holy,
        any evil that they saw her do,
        they assumed was not evil  )

12. This is Satan's work:
     he seems to take advantage
          of the virtues we may have,
     for the purpose of giving a sanction,
          so far as he can,
       to the evil he aims at;

   how slight soever that evil may be,
     his gain must be great,
   if it prevail in a religious house.

   How much, then, must his gain have been,
     when the evil I did was so very great!

   And thus, during many years,
     only three persons were the better
         for what I said to them;

   but now that our Lord has made me
        stronger in virtue,
   in the course of two or three years
       many persons have profited,
   as I shall show hereafter. [7]

13. There is another great inconvenience
    in addition to this:
         - the loss to our own soul;
    for the utmost we have to do in the beginning
    is to
      -- take care of our own soul only, and
      -- consider that in the whole world
                there is only God and our soul.
    This is a point of great importance.

14. There is another temptation--
          we ought to be aware of it,
        and be cautious in our conduct:
     - persons are
             carried away by a zeal for virtue,
        through the pain which the sight
           of the sins and failings of others
              occasions them.

   Satan tells them that this pain arises only
     - out of their desire
           that God may not be offended, and
       
     - out of their anxiety
           about His honour;

     so they immediately seek to remedy the evil.

    This so disturbs them,
         that they cannot pray.

    The greatest evil of all is
       - their thinking
            (that) this an act
               -- of virtue,
               -- of perfection, and
               -- of a great zeal for God.

    I am not speaking of the pain
          which public sins occasion,
        if they be habitual in any community,
           nor of wrongs done to the Church,
           nor of heresies
        by which so many souls are visibly lost;
      for this pain is most wholesome, and
        being wholesome is no source of disquiet.

  The security, therefore, of that soul
      which would apply itself to prayer lies
        - in casting away from itself
            all anxiety about persons and things,
        - in taking care of itself, and
        - in pleasing God.
    This is the most profitable course.

15. If I were to speak of the mistakes
           which I have seen people make,
      in reliance on their own good intentions,
           I should never come to an end.

  Let us labour, therefore,
     always to consider
          - the virtues and the good qualities
              which we discern in others, and

          - with our own great sins
               cover our eyes,
     so that we may see none of their failings.

   This is one way of doing our work;
     and though we may not be perfect
              in it at once,
     we shall acquire one great virtue--
         - we shall look upon all men
                as better than ourselves;

     and we begin to acquire that virtue in this way,
         by the grace of God,
     which is necessary in all things--
    
       for when we have it not,
         all our endeavours are in vain--
       and by imploring Him to give us this virtue;
         for He never fails us,
      if we do what we can.

16. This advice, also, they must take
             into their consideration
        who make much use
              of their understanding,
                 eliciting from one subject
                 many thoughts and conceptions.

As to those who, like myself, cannot do it,
   I have no advice to give,
except that they are to have patience,
   until our Lord shall send them
           both matter and light;
   for they can do so little of themselves,
     that their understanding is
        a hindrance to them
        rather than a help.

17. To those, then, who can
           make use of their understanding,
   I say that they are
       not to spend the whole time in that way;

  for though it be most meritorious,
     yet they must not,
   when prayer is sweet,
     suppose that there
   never will be a Sunday or a time
         when no work ought to be done.

   They think it lost time to do otherwise;
      but I think that loss their greatest gain.

  Let them rather,
            as I have said, [8]
      - place themselves
          in the presence of Christ, and,
      - without fatiguing the understanding,
      - converse with Him, and
      - in Him rejoice,

    without wearying themselves
        in searching out reasons;

     but let them rather lay
       - their necessities before Him, and
       - the just reasons there are
            why He should not suffer us
                    in His presence:
               at one time this, at another time that,
      lest the soul should be wearied
           by always eating of the same food.

     These meats are most savoury and wholesome,
        if the palate be accustomed to them;
            they will furnish a great support
                 for the life of the soul, and
            they have many other advantages also.

18. I will explain myself further;
     for the doctrine of prayer is difficult, and,
     without a director, very hard to understand.

    Though I would willingly be concise, and
     though a mere hint is enough
          for his clear intellect
     who has commanded me to write
          on the subject of prayer,

      yet so it is,
          my dullness does not allow me
              to say or explain in a few words
         that which it is so important to explain well.

    I, who have gone through so much,
      am sorry for those
              who begin only with books;
          for there is a strange difference between
           - that which we learn by reading, and
           - that which we learn by experience.

19. Going back, then, to what I was saying.
           - We set ourselves to meditate
                 upon some mystery of the Passion:
               let us say, our Lord at the pillar.

           - The understanding goeth about
                 seeking for the sources
                     (factors, circumstance)
              out of which came the great dolours
                     and the bitter anguish
              which His Majesty endured in that desolation.

          - It considers that mystery in many lights,
              which the intellect, if it
                   be skilled in its work, or
                   furnished with learning,
              may there obtain.

           - This is a method of prayer
                   which should be to everyone
                        the beginning,
                        the middle, and
                        the end:
                a most excellent and safe way,
                   until our Lord shall guide them
                     to other supernatural ways.

20. I say to all,
          because there are many souls
            who make greater progress
                  by meditation on other subjects
                       than on the Sacred Passion;

         for as there are many mansions in heaven,
            so there are also many roads leading thither.

  Some persons advance
      by considering

        - themselves in hell,

        - others in heaven--
             and these are distressed by meditations on hell.

        - Others meditate on death;

        - some persons, if tender-hearted,
              are greatly fatigued by continual
                  meditations on the Passion;
              but are consoled and make progress
                 when they meditate
              -- on the power and greatness
                       of God in His creatures, and
              -- on His love visible in all things.

      This is an admirable method-
          - not omitting, however, from time to time,
              the Passion and Life of Christ,
                  the Source of all good
                         that ever came, and
                         that ever shall come.

21. He who begins
             is in need of instruction,
       whereby he may ascertain
             what profits him most.

      For this end it is very necessary
            he should have a director,
      who ought to be a person of experience;
          for if he be not,
             - he will make many mistakes, and
             - direct a soul
               -- without understanding its ways,
                    or suffering it to understand them itself;

          for such a soul,
               knowing that obedience to a director
                   is highly meritorious,
               dares not transgress the commandments
                   it receives.

        I have met with souls cramped and tormented,
              because he who directed them
                    had no experience:
        that made me sorry for them.

        Some of them knew not what to do
             with themselves;
         for directors who do not understand
              the spirit of their penitents
                afflict them soul and body, and
                hinder their progress. [9]

22. One person I had to do with
     had been kept by her director for eight years,
            as it were, in prison;
     he would not allow her
           to quit the subject of self-knowledge;
     and yet our Lord had already raised her
           to the prayer of quiet;
        so she had much to suffer.

23. Although this matter of self-knowledge
           must never be put aside--

         for there is no soul
           so great a giant on this road
        but has frequent need to turn back,
           and be again an infant at the breast;

        and this must never be forgotten.
        I shall repeat it, [10] perhaps, many times,
            because of its great importance-

        for among all the states of prayer,
            however high they may be,
        there is not one in which it is not often necessary
            to go back to the beginning.

     The knowledge
         - of our sins, and
         - of our own selves,
      is the bread which we have to eat
         with all the meats,
      however delicate they may be,
          in the way of prayer;

      without this bread,
          life cannot be sustained,
      though it must be taken
         by measure.

  When a soul
     - beholds itself resigned, and
     - clearly understands
            that there is no goodness in it
     - when it feels itself abashed
           in the presence of so great a King,
        and
     - sees how little it pays
           of the great debt it owes Him--
   why should it be necessary for it
         to waste its time on this subject?

   Why should it not rather proceed
        to other matters
           which our Lord places before it,
     and for neglecting which there is no reason?

    His Majesty surely knows better
        than we do
    what kind of food is proper for us.

24. So, then, it is of great consequence
    that the director should be
     - prudent--I mean,
           of sound understanding--and
     - a man of experience.
    If, in addition to this,
    - he is a learned man, it is a very great matter.

   But if these three qualities
           cannot be had together,
      the first two are the most important,

   because learned men may be found
        with whom we can communicate
   when it is necessary.

  I mean, that for beginners
     learned men are of little use,
  if they are not men of prayer.

  I do not say that
    they are to have nothing to do
        with learned men,
  because a spirituality,
      the foundations of which
         are not resting on the truth,
  I would rather
     were not accompanied with prayer.
  (She emphasizes the importance of truth)

 Learning is a great thing, for it
     - teaches us who know so little, and
     - enlightens us;
  so when we have come
     to the knowledge of the truths
       contained in the holy writings,
     we do what we ought to do.

 From silly devotions, God deliver us!

25. I will explain myself further,
           for I am meddling, I believe,
        with too many matters.

       It has always been my failing
           that I could never make myself understood--
       as I said before [11]--
           but at the cost of many words.

    A nun begins to practise prayer;
    if her director be silly,
      and
    if he should take it into his head,
        he will make her feel that
             it is better for her to obey him
                  than her own superior.
        He will do all this
                 without any evil purpose,
            thinking that he is doing right.

     For if he be not a religious himself,
           he will think this right enough.

    If his penitent be a married woman,
        he will tell her
          that it is better for her
              to give herself unto prayer,
          when she ought
              to attend to her house,
         although she may thereby
            displease her husband.

     And so it is,
        he knows not how to make arrangements
             for time and business,
     so that everything may be done
           as it ought to be done;

     he has no light himself,
     and can therefore give none to others,
       however much he may wish to do so.

26. Though learning does not seem necessary
          for discretion,
     my opinion has always been,
        and will be,
     that every Christian should continue
         to be guided by a learned director
             if he can,
     and the more learned the better.

    They who walk in the way of prayer
       have the greater need of learning;
     and the more spiritual they are
       the greater is that need.

    Let them not say
        that learned men
            not given to prayer
        are not fit counsellors
            for those who pray:
    that is a delusion.

    I have conversed with many;
       and now for some years
    I have sought them the more,
       because of my greater need of them.

    I have always been fond of them;

    for though some of them
       have no experience,
          - they do not dislike spirituality,
          - neither are they ignorant of what it is,
      because in the sacred writings
         with which they are familiar
      they always find the truth about spirituality.

    I am certain myself that
         a person given to prayer,
     who treats of these matters with learned men,
        unless he is deceived with his own consent,
            will never be carried away
               by any illusions of the devil.

     I believe that the evil spirits
         are exceedingly afraid of learned men
     who are humble and virtuous,
         knowing that they will be found out
     and defeated by them.

27. I have said this
       because there are opinions held
     to the effect that learned men,
           if they are not spiritual,
         are not suited for persons given to prayer.

   I have just said
      that a spiritual director is necessary;
   but if he be not a learned man,
      he is a great hindrance.

   It will help us much
      if we consult those who are learned,
         provided they be virtuous;
         even if they be not spiritual,

          - they will be of service to me, and
          - God will enable them to understand
               what they should teach;
          - He will even make them spiritual,
                in order that they may help us on.

    I do not say this
       without having had experience of it;
     and I have met with more than two.

28. I say, then, that a person
      who shall resign his soul
         to be wholly subject to one director
             will make a great mistake,
                    if he is in religion,
             unless he finds a director of this kind,
          because of the obedience
              due to his own superior.

     His director may be deficient in the three requisites
          I speak of, [12]
      and that will be no slight cross,
          without voluntarily subjecting the understanding
                 to one whose understanding
                     is none of the best.

      At least, I have never been able
            to bring myself to do it,
      neither does it seem to me to be right.

29. But if he be a person living in the world,
        - let him praise God for the power he has
               of choosing whom he will obey, and
        - let him not lose so excellent a liberty;
          yea, rather
        - let him be without a director till he finds him--

       for our Lord will give him one, if he
          - is really humble, and
          - has a desire to meet with the right person.

      I praise God greatly--

      we women, and those who are unlearned,
          ought always to render Him unceasing thanks--
      because there are persons
          who, by labours so great,
              have attained to the truth,
     of which we unlearned people are ignorant.

    I often wonder at learned men--
      particularly those who are in religion--
   when I think of the trouble
      they have had in acquiring
        that which they communicate to me
             for my good, and
        that without any more trouble to me
             than the asking for it.

     And yet there are people
        who will not take advantage of their learning:

     God grant it may not be so!

30. I see them undergo
         - the poverty of the religious life,
             which is great, together with
         - its penances,
         - its meagre food,
         - the yoke of obedience,
      which makes me ashamed of myself at times;
        and with all this,
         - interrupted sleep,
         - trials everywhere,
         - everywhere the Cross.

      I think it would be a great evil for any one
          to lose so great a good by his own fault.

     It may be some of us,
        who are exempted from these burdens--
        who have our food put into our mouths,
               as they say,
         and live at our ease--
              may think,
         because we give ourselves
                   a little more to prayer,
             that we are raised above
                   the necessity of such great hardships.

     Blessed be Thou, O Lord,
       who hast made me so incapable and so useless;
     but I bless Thee still more for this--
        that Thou quickenest so many
            to quicken us.

    Our prayer must therefore be very earnest
        for those who give us light.

    What should we be without them
          in the midst of these violent storms
     which now disturb the Church?

    If some have fallen,
        the good will shine more and more. [13]

    May it please our Lord
        to hold them in His hand, and
            help them,
        that they may help us.

31. I have gone far away from the subject
           I began to speak of;
        but all is to the purpose
           for those who are beginners,
        that they may begin a journey
           which is so high in such a way
        as that they shall go on by the right road.

     Coming back, then,
             to what I spoke of before, [14]
        the meditation on Christ bound to the pillar,

        it is well we should
          - make reflections for a time, and
          - consider
             -- the sufferings He there endured,
             -- for whom He endured them,
             -- who He is who endured them, and
             -- the love with which He bore them.

       But a person
        - should not always fatigue himself
              in making these reflections,
        - but rather let him remain there with Christ,
              in the silence of the understanding.

32. If he is able,

          - let him employ himself in looking upon Christ,
              Who is looking upon him;

          - let him accompany Him, and

          - make his petitions to Him;

          - let him humble himself, and

          - delight himself in Christ, and

          - keep in mind
               that he never deserved to be there.

       When he shall be able to do this,
            though it may be in the beginning of his prayer,
         he will find great advantage; and

        this way of prayer brings great advantages with it--
            at least, so my soul has found it.

      I do not know whether I am describing it aright;
         you, my Father, will see to it.

      May our Lord grant me
          to please Him rightly for ever!
     Amen.
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1. Ch. 11 # 24.

2. Philipp. 4 : 13; "Omnia possum in Eo."

3. Confess.10. ch. 29: "Da quod jubes, et jube quod vis."

4. St. Matt. 15: 30: "Videns vero ventum validum, timuit."

5. Ch. 7 # 27, 31.

6. Ch. 7  # 16.

7. See ch. 31 # 7, and ch. 34 # 14.

8. Ch. 12 #3.

9. See St. John of the Cross,
    Living Flame, pp. 267, 278-284,
       Engl. trans.

10. See ch. 15 # 20.

11. #18.

12. Prudence, experience, and learning;
          see # 24.

13. Dan. 12; 3:
      "Qui autem docti fuerint,
       fulgebunt quasi splendor firmamenti."

14. #19.
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