Teresa of Jesus
The Life of St. Teresa of Jesus,
of the Order of Our Lady of Carmel
CHAPTER 28
She treats of
- the great favours God showed her, and
- how He appeared to her for the first time;
She explains
- what an imaginary vision is, and
- speaks of the powerful effects
it leaves and
- the signs whether it is from God.
This chapter is most profitable and noteworthy.
- Visions of the Sacred Humanity,
and of the Glorified Bodies.
- Imaginary Visions.
Great Fruits Thereof When They Come from God.
_______________________
Topics/ Questions
to keep in mind
as we read along:
1). St Teresa talked about types of visions.
What were they ?
[ Life: Ch. 28; #2, 4, 5, 12, 14 ]
2). How did St. Teresa describe the
her various responses
to her imaginary visions?
[ Life: Ch. 28; #2, 3, 6, 7, 14, 19, 22 ]
3). How does St. Teresa explain that
an imaginary vision,
seen "only with the eyes of the soul",
is not a product of the
human imagination ?
[ Life: Ch. 28; #1, 7, 8, 11,
12, 13, 14, 16, 17 ]
4). What does St. Teresa say about
the risk or lack of risks
of the Imaginative vision?
[ Life: Ch. 28; # 15, 16]
5). How did St. Teresa know that her
"Imaginative visions"
were not a deception of the devil?
[ Life: Ch. 28; # 19 ]
6). Why did St. Teresa describe in detail
the trials and distress which
she experienced from the response
of others to reports
of her experience in prayer?
[ Life: Ch. 28; # 10, 24 ]
___________________________
Chapter 28
1. I now resume our subject.
I spent some days, not many,
with that vision [405]
continually before me.
It did me so much good,
that I never ceased to pray.
Even when I did cease,
I contrived that it should be
in such a way as that
I should not displease Him
whom I saw so clearly present,
an eye-witness of my acts.
And though I was occasionally afraid,
because so much was said to me
about delusions,
that fear lasted not long,
because our Lord reassured me.
2. It pleased our Lord,
one day that I was in prayer,
to show me His Hands,
and His Hands only.
The beauty of them was so great,
that no language can describe it.
This put me in great fear;
for everything that is strange,
in the beginning
of any new grace from God,
makes me very much afraid.
A few days later, I saw His divine Face
and I was utterly entranced.
I could not understand
why our Lord showed Himself
in this way,
seeing that, afterwards,
He granted me the grace
of seeing His whole Person.
Later on, I understood
that His Majesty was dealing with me
according to the weakness
of my nature.
May He be blessed for ever!
A glory so great was
more than one so base and wicked
could bear;
and our merciful Lord,
knowing this,
ordered it in this way.
3. You will think, my father,
that it required no great courage
to look upon Hands and Face
so beautiful.
But so beautiful are glorified bodies,
that the glory which surrounds them
renders those,
--who see that which is
so supernatural beautiful--,
beside themselves.
But there is such beauty about glorified bodies that the glory which illumines them throws all, who look upon such supernatural loveliness, into confusion. - Peers translation |
It was so with me:
I was in such great fear, trouble, and
perplexity at the sight.
Afterwards there ensued
a sense of safety and certainty,
together with other results,
so that all fear passed
immediately away. [406]
4. On one of the feasts of St. Paul, [407]
when I was at Mass,
there stood before me
the most Sacred Humanity, [408]
as painters represent Him
after the resurrection,
in great beauty and majesty,
as I particularly described it to you,
my father,
when you had insisted on it.
It was painful enough
to have to write about it,
for I could not describe it
without doing great violence
to myself.
But I described it as well as I could,
and there is no reason
why I should now recur to it.
One thing, however, I have to say:
if in heaven itself
there were nothing else
to delight our eyes
but the great beauty
of glorified bodies,
that would be an excessive bliss,
particularly the vision
of the Humanity of Jesus Christ
our Lord.
If here below,
where His Majesty shows Himself to us
according to the measure
which our wretchedness can bear,
it is so great,
what must it be there,
where the fruition of it is complete!
5. This vision, though imaginary,
I never saw with my bodily eyes,
nor, indeed, any other,
but only with the eyes of the soul.
Those who understand these things
better than I do, say that
- the intellectual vision is
more perfect than this; and
- this, the imaginary vision,
much more perfect than those visions
which are seen by the bodily eyes.
The latter kind of visions, they say,
is the lowest;
and it is by these
that the devil can most delude us.[409]
I did not know it then;
for I wished,
when this grace had been granted me,
that it had been so in such a way
that I could see it with my bodily eyes,
in order that my confessor
might not say to me
that I indulged in fancies.
6. After the vision was over,
it happened
that I too imagined
--the thought came at once--
(that) I had fancied these things;
so I was distressed,
because I had spoken of them
to my confessor,
thinking that I might have been
deceiving him.
There was another lamentation:
I went to my confessor,
and told him of my doubts.
He would ask me
whether I told him the truth
so far as I knew it;
or, if not,
had I intended to deceive him?
I would reply,
that I told the truth;
for, to the best of my belief,
I did not lie,
nor did I mean anything
of the kind;
neither would I tell a lie
for the whole world. [410]
This he knew well enough;
and, accordingly, he contrived
to quiet me;
and I felt so much the going to him
with these doubts,
that I cannot tell
how Satan could have put it
into my head
that I invented those things
for the purpose of tormenting myself.
7. But our Lord made such haste
to bestow this grace upon me, and
to declare the reality of it,
that all doubts of the vision
being a fancy on my part
were quickly taken away,
and ever since I see most clearly
how silly I was.
For if I were to spend many years
in devising how to picture to myself
anything so beautiful,
I should never be able,
nor even know how to do it
for it is beyond the reach
of any possible imagination
here below:
the whiteness and brilliancy alone
are inconceivable.
It is not a brilliancy which dazzles,
but a delicate whiteness
and a brilliancy infused,
furnishing the most excessive
delight to the eyes,
never wearied thereby,
nor by the visible brightness
which enables us
to see a beauty so divine.
It is a light
so different
from any light here below,
that the very brightness of the sun
we see,
in comparison with
the brightness and light
before our eyes,
seems to be something
so obscure,
that no one would ever wish
to open his eyes again.
8. It is like most pellucid water
running in a bed of crystal,
reflecting the rays of the sun
compared with most muddy water
on a cloudy day,
flowing on the surface of the earth.
Not that there is anything like the sun
present here,
nor is the light like that of the sun:
this light seems to be natural;
and, in comparison with it,
every other light is
something artificial.
It is a light which knows no night;
but rather,
as it is always light,
nothing ever disturbs it.
In short, it is such
that no man,
however gifted he may be,
can ever,
in the whole course of his life,
arrive at any imagination
of what it is.
God puts it before us so
instantaneously,
that we could not open our eyes
in time to see it,
if it were necessary for us
to open them at all.
But whether our eyes be open or shut,
it makes no difference whatever;
for when our Lord wills,
we must see it,
whether we will or not.
No distraction can shut it out,
no power can resist it,
nor can we attain to it
by any diligence or efforts
of our own.
I know this by experience well,
as I shall show you.
9. That which I wish now to speak of
is the manner in which
our Lord manifests Himself
in these visions.
I do not mean that I am going to explain
how it is that
- a light so strong can enter
the interior sense, or
- so distinct an image ( can enter )
the understanding,
so as to seem to be really there;
for this must be work for learned men.
Our Lord has not been pleased
to let me understand how it is.
I am so ignorant myself, and
so dull of understanding,
that, although people have very much
wished to explain it to me,
I have never been able to
how it can be.
10. This is the truth:
though you, my father, may think
that I have a quick understanding,
it is not so;
for I have found out, in many ways,
that my understanding can take in only,
as they say,
what is given to it to eat.
Sometimes my confessor used to be
amazed at my ignorance:
and he never explained to me
nor, indeed, did I desire to understand
how God did this,
nor how it could be.
Nor did I ever ask;
though, as I have said, [411]
I had converse for many years
with men of great learning.
But I did ask them
if this or that were a sin or not:
as for everything else,
the thought that God did it all
was enough for me.
I saw there was no reason to be afraid
but great reason to praise Him.
On the other hand,
difficulties increase my devotion; and
the greater the difficulty
the greater the increase.
11. I will therefore relate
what my experience has shown me;
but how our Lord brought it about,
you, my father,
will explain better than I can, and
make clear all that is obscure, and
beyond my skill to explain.
Now and then it seemed to me
that what I saw was an image;
but most frequently
it was not so.
I thought it was Christ Himself,
judging by the brightness
in which He was pleased
to show Himself.
Sometimes the vision was so indistinct,
that I thought it was an image;
but still not like a picture,
however well painted
and I have seen many good pictures.
It would be absurd to suppose
that the one bears any resemblance
whatever to the other,
for they differ as a living person
differs from his portrait,
which, however well drawn,
cannot be lifelike,
for it is plain that it is a dead thing.
But let this pass,
though to the purpose, and literally true.
12. I do not say this
by way of comparison,
for comparisons are never exact,
but because it is the truth itself,
as there is the same difference here
that there is between
a living subject and
the portrait thereof,
neither more nor less:
for if what I saw was an image,
it was a living image,
not a dead man,
but the living Christ:
and He makes me see
that He is God and man,
not as He was in the sepulchre,
but as He was
when He had gone forth from it,
risen from the dead.
He comes at times in majesty so great,
that no one can have any doubt
that it is our Lord Himself,
especially after Communion:
we know that He is then present,
for faith says so.
He shows Himself so clearly
to be the Lord
of that little dwelling-place,
that the soul seems to be
dissolved and
lost in Christ.
O my Jesus,
who can describe the majesty
wherein Thou showest Thyself!
How utterly Thou art the Lord
of the whole world, and
of heaven, and
of a thousand other and innumerable
worlds and heavens,
the creation of which
is possible to Thee!
The soul understands by that majesty
wherein Thou showest Thyself
that it is nothing for Thee
to be Lord of all this.
13. Here it is plain, O my Jesus,
how slight is the power
of all the devils
in comparison with Thine,
and how he
who is pleasing unto Thee
is able to tread all hell under his feet.
Here we see
why the devils trembled
when Thou didst go
down to Limbus, and
why they might have longed
for a thousand hells still lower,
that they might escape
from Thy terrible Majesty.
I see that it is Thy will
(that) the soul should feel
the greatness of Thy Majesty, and
the power of Thy most
Sacred Humanity,
united with Thy Divinity.
Here, too, we see
what the day of judgment will be,
when we shall behold the King
in His Majesty, and
in the rigour of His justice
against the wicked.
Here we learn true humility,
imprinted in the soul
by the sight of its own wretchedness,
of which now it cannot be ignorant.
Here, also, is
confusion of face, and
true repentance for sins;
for though the soul sees
that our Lord shows
how He loves it,
yet it knows not where to go,
and so is utterly dissolved.
14. My meaning is,
that so exceedingly great
is the power of this vision,
when our Lord shows the soul
much of His grandeur and majesty,
that it is impossible, in my opinion,
for any soul to endure it,
if our Lord did not succour it
in a most supernatural way,
by throwing it
into a trance or ecstasy,
whereby the vision
of the divine presence
is lost in the fruition thereof.
It is true
that afterwards the vision is forgotten;
but there remains so deep an impression
of the majesty and beauty of God,
that it is impossible to forget it,
except when our Lord is pleased
that the soul should suffer
from aridity and desolation,
of which I shall speak hereafter; [412]
for then it seems to forget God Himself.
The soul is itself no longer,
it is always inebriated;
it seems as if a living love of God,
of the highest kind,
made a new beginning within it;
for though the former vision,
( intellectual vision )
which I said represented God
without any likeness of Him, [413]
is of a higher kind,
yet because of our weakness,
in order
that the remembrance of the vision
may last, and
that our thoughts may be
well occupied,
it is a great matter that a presence
so divine should remain and abide
in our imagination.
These two kinds of visions
come almost always together,
and they do so come;
for we behold the excellency
and beauty and glory
of the most Holy Humanity
with the eyes of the soul.
And in the other way I have spoken of,
that of intellectual vision,
we learn how He
is God,
is mighty,
can do all things,
commands all things,
governs all things, and
fills all things with His love.
15. This vision is
to be esteemed very highly;
nor is there, in my opinion,
any risk in it,
because the fruits of it show
that the devil has no power here.
I think he tried three or four times
to represent our Lord to me,
in this way,
by a false image of Him.
He takes the appearance of flesh,
but he cannot counterfeit the glory
which it has
when the vision is from God.
Satan makes his representations
in order to undo the true vision
which the soul has had:
but the soul
resists instinctively;
is troubled, disgusted, and restless;
it loses that devotion and joy
(which) it previously had,
and cannot pray at all.
In the beginning, it so happened to me
three or four times.
These satanic visions
are very different things;
and even he who shall have attained
to the prayer of quiet only
will, I believe, detect them
by those results of them
which I described
when I was speaking of locutions.[414]
They are most easily recognised;
and if a soul consents not
to its own delusion,
I do not think that Satan
will be able to deceive it,
provided it walks in
humility and
singleness of heart.
He, who shall have had the true vision,
coming from God,
detects the false visions at once;
for, though they begin
with a certain sweetness and joy,
the soul rejects them of itself;
and the joy
which Satan ministers
must be, I think, very different:
It shows no traces
of pure and holy love:
Satan very quickly betrays himself.
16. Thus, then, as I believe,
Satan can do no harm to anyone
who has had experience
of these things;
for it is the most impossible
of all impossible things
that all this may be the work
of the imagination.
There is no ground whatever
for the supposition;
for the very beauty and whiteness
of one of our Lord's Hands [415]
are beyond our imagination altogether.
How is it
that we see present before us,
in a moment,
what we do not remember,
what we have never thought of,
and, moreover,
what, in a long space of time,
the imagination could not compass,
because, as I have just said, [416]
it far transcends anything
we can comprehend in this life?
This, then, is not possible.
Whether we have any power
in the matter
or not
will appear by what I am now
going to say.
17. If the vision were the work
of a man's own understanding,
setting aside that such a vision would
not accomplish the great
of the true one,
nor, indeed, any at all,
it would be as the act of one
who tries to go to sleep, and
yet continues awake,
because sleep has not come.
He longs for it,
because of some necessity
or weakness in his head:
and so he lulls himself to sleep,
and makes efforts to procure it,
and now and then
thinks he has succeeded;
but, if the sleep be not real,
it will not support him,
nor supply strength to his head:
on the contrary,
his head will very often
be the worse for it.
So will it be here, in a measure;
the soul will be dissipated,
neither sustained
nor strengthened;
on the contrary,
it will be wearied and disgusted.
But, in the true vision,
the riches which abide in the soul
cannot be described;
even the body
receives health and comfort.
18. I urged this argument, among others,
when they told me
that my visions came
from the evil one, and
that I imagined them myself,
and it was very often,
and ( I ) made use
of certain illustrations,
as well as I could, and
as our Lord suggested to me.
But all was to little purpose;
for as there were most holy persons
in the place,
in comparison with
whom I was a mass of perdition,
whom God did not lead by this way,
they were at once
filled with fear;
they thought it all came
through my sins.
And so my state
was talked about, and
came to the knowledge of many;
though I had spoken of it
to no one, except my confessor, or
to those to whom
he commanded [417] me
to speak of it.
19. I said to them once,
If they, who thus speak of my state,
were to tell me
that a person with
whom I had just conversed, and
whom I knew well,
was not that person,
but
that I was deluding myself, and
that they knew it,
I should certainly trust them
rather than my own eyes.
But
if that person left with me
certain jewels, and
if, possessing none previously,
I held the jewels in my hand
as pledges of a great love, and
if I were now rich,
instead of poor as before,
I should not be able to believe this
that they said,
though I might wish it.
These jewels,
I could now show them,
for all who knew me saw clearly
that my soul was changed,
and so my confessor said;
for the difference
was very great in every way
not a pretence,
but such as all might
most clearly observe.
As I was formerly so wicked,
I said, I could not believe
that Satan, if he
wished to deceive me and
take me down to hell,
would have recourse to means
so adverse to his purpose
as this, of
rooting out my faults,
implanting virtues
and spiritual strength;
for I saw clearly
that I had become at once
another person
through the instrumentality
of these visions.
20. My confessor,
who was,
as I said before, [418]
one of the fathers
of the Society of Jesus, and
a really holy man,
answered them in the same way,
so I learnt afterwards.
He was a most discreet man,
and of great humility;
but this great humility of his
brought me into serious trouble:
for, though he was a man
much given to prayer, and
(much) learned,
he never trusted his own judgment,
because our Lord was not leading him
by this way.
He had, therefore, much to suffer
on my account, in many ways.
I knew they used to say to him
that he must be
on his guard against me,
lest Satan should delude him
through a belief
in anything I might say to him.
They gave instances of others
who were deluded. [419]
All this distressed me.
I began to be afraid
( that) I should find no one
to hear my confession, [420] and
that all would avoid me.
I did nothing but weep.
21. It was a providence of God
that he was willing to
stand by me and
hear my confession.
But he was so great a servant of God,
that he would have exposed himself
to anything for His sake.
So he told me that
if I did not offend God,
nor swerve from the instructions
he gave me,
there was no fear
(that) I should be deserted by him.
He encouraged me always,
and quieted me.
He bade me never to conceal
anything from him;
and I never did. [421]
He used to say that,
so long as I did this,
the devil, if it were the devil,
could not hurt me;
on the contrary, out of that evil
which Satan wished to do me,
our Lord would bring forth good.
He laboured with all his might
to make me perfect.
As I was very much afraid myself,
I obeyed him in everything,
though imperfectly.
He had much to suffer
on my account
during three years
of trouble and more,
because he heard my confession
all that time;
for in the great persecutions
that fell upon me,
and the many harsh judgments
of me
which our Lord permitted,
many of which I did not deserve,
everything was carried to him, and
he was found fault with
because of me,
he being all the while
utterly blameless.
22. If he had not been so holy a man, and
if our Lord had not been with him,
it would have been impossible for him
to bear so much;
for he had to answer those
who regarded me
as one going to destruction;
and they would not believe
what he said to them.
On the other hand,
he had to
quiet me, and
relieve me of my fears;
when my fears increased,
he had again to reassure me;
for, after every vision
which was strange to me,
our Lord permitted me
to remain in great fear.
All this was the result
of my being then, and
of having been,
a sinner.
He used to console me
out of his great compassion;
and, if he had trusted
to his own convictions,
I should not have had
so much to suffer;
for God revealed the whole truth
to him.
I believe that he received this light
from the Blessed Sacrament.
23. Those servants of God,
who were not satisfied,
had many conversations with me.[422]
As I spoke to them carelessly,
so they misunderstood my meaning
in many things.
I had a great regard for one of them;
for my soul owed him
more than I can tell.
He was a most holy man,
and I felt it most acutely
when I saw
that he did not understand me.
He had a great desire
for my improvement,
and hoped our Lord
would enlighten me.
So, then, because I spoke,
as I was saying,
without careful consideration,
they looked upon me
as deficient in humility;
and when they detected
any of my faults --
they might have detected many--
they condemned me at once.
They used to put certain questions
to me,
which I answered
simply and carelessly.
Then they concluded forthwith
that I wished to teach them, and
that I considered myself
to be a learned woman.
All this was carried to my confessor,
for certainly they desired
my amendment and
so he would reprimand me.
This lasted some time,
and I was distressed on many sides;
but, with the graces
which our Lord gave me,
I bore it all.
24. I relate this
in order that people may see
what a great trial it is
not to find any one
who knows this way of the spirit
by experience.
If our Lord had not dealt so favourably
with me,
I know not
what would have become of me.
There were some things
that were enough
to take away my reason;
and now and then
I was reduced to such straits
that I could do nothing
but lift up my eyes to our Lord. [423]
The contradiction of good people,
which a wretched woman,
weak, wicked, and timid as I am,
must bear with,
seems to be nothing
when thus described;
but I, who in the course of my life
passed through very great trials,
found this one of the heaviest. [424]
25. May our Lord grant
that I may have pleased His Majesty
a little herein;
for I am sure that they pleased Him
who condemned and rebuked me,
and that it was all for my great good.
____________________
FootNotes:
[405] [328]Ch. xxvii. § 3.
[406] Philipp. a SS. Trinitate, Theolog. Mystic.
par. 2, tr. 3, disc. iv., art. 8:
"Quamvis in principio visiones a daemone fictae
aliquam habeant pacem ac dulcedinem,
in fine tamen confusionum et amaritudinem in anima
relinquunt; cujus contrarium est in divinis visionibus,
quae saepe turbant in principio,
sed semper in fine pacem animae relinquunt."
St. John of the Cross,
[329]Spiritual Canticle, st. 14, p.84:
"In the spiritual passage from the sleep of natural ignorance
to the wakefulness of the supernatural understanding,
which is the beginning of trance or ecstasy, the spiritual
vision then revealed makes the soul fear and tremble."
[407] See [330]ch. xxix. § 4.
[408] "The holy Mother, Teresa of Jesus,
had these imaginary visions for many years,
seeing our Lord continually present before her
in great beauty, risen from the dead,
with His wounds and the crown of thorns.
She had a picture made of Him, which she gave to me,
and which I gave to Don Fernando de Toledo, Duke of Alva"
(Jerome Gratian, Union del Alma, cap. 5.
Madrid, 1616).
[409] Anton. a Sp. Sancto, Direct. Mystic.
tr. iii. disp. 5, § I, n. 315:
"Visio corporea est infima, visio imaginaria est media,
visio intellectualis est suprema." N. 322:
"Apparitio visibilis, cum sit omnium infima,
est magis exposita illusioni diaboli,
nisi forte huic visioni corporali visio intellectualis adjungatur,
ut in apparitione S. Gabrielis archangeli facta Beatae Virgini."
[410] See [331]ch. xxx. § 18.
[411] [332]Ch. xxv. § 18.
[412] [333]Ch. xxx. §§ 9, 10.
See St. John of the Cross,
[334]Obscure Night, bk. ii. ch. 7.
[413] [335]Ch. xxvii. § 3.
[414] [336]Ch. xxv. § 8.
[415] See [337]§ 2.
[416] [338]§ 7, supra.
[417] See [339]ch. xxiii. § 14.
[418] [340]Ch. xxiv. § 5.
[419] There were in Spain, and elsewhere,
many women who were hypocrites, or deluded.
Among others was the prioress of Lisbon,
afterwards notorious, who deceived
Luis of Granada (De la Fuente).
[420] Inner Fortress, vi. 1, § 4.
[421] [341]Ch. xxvi. § 5;
Inner Fortress, vi. 9, § 7.
[422] See [342]ch. xxv. § 18.
[423] 2 Paralip. xx. 12:
"Sed cum ignoremus quid agere debeamus,
hoc solum habemus residui,
ut oculos nostros dirigamus ad Te."
[424] See [343]ch. xxx. § 6.
End of Chapter 28 |
