Discussion of Ch. 7 - The Autobiography of St. Teresa of Avila - The Life of Teresa of Jesus

The Life of St. Teresa of Jesus
of the Order of Our Lady of Carmel

CHAPTER 7

 Describes:
- Of the way whereby she lost the graces
   God had granted her,
- and the wretched life she began to lead;
- she also speaks of the danger arising
   from the want of a strict enclosure
   in convents of nuns.

- Lukewarmness.
- The Loss of Grace.
- Inconvenience of Laxity in Religious Houses.

Discussion Questions:
1a). How did St. Teresa err
       "under the pretence of humility" ?
        [ Life: Ch. 7: #1, 2, 17 ]

1b). Did she think that she deceived others?
       What was her intention?
         [ Life: Ch. 7: #1, 2, 3 ]

2a). What did St. Teresa say
         caused her soul to be
         "injured and dissipated"?
           [ Life: Ch. 7: #1, 2, 10, 12]

2b). What does she say
         she should have been doing?
           [ Life: Ch. 7: #1, 14, 17, 11 ]

3). St. Teresa reported that
     "It did me much harm
          that I did not then know".
3a). What was it that she didn't know ?
          [ Life: Ch. 7: # 12, 11 ]

3b). How did it cause her "much harm" ?
         [ Life: Ch. 7: # 12 ]

4). What was the incident of the
       "great toad and its significance?
         [ Life: Ch. 7: #12, 13 ]

5a). What was a temptation for St. Teresa
         and a "most common temptation in beginners" ?
          [ Life: Ch. 7: #16, 21 ]

5b). How did she describe her actions
          in regard to this temptation ?
           [ Life: Ch. 7: # 16, 17, 20, 21 ]

6). Is there any sufficient reason not to pray?
       [ Life: Ch. 7:  #19, 24, 20 ]

7a). By means of prayer, what did she learn ?
         [ Life: Ch. 7: #27 ]

7b). What were the "two contradictions" that she
         endured "without abandoning
         either the one or the other"?
              [ Life: Ch. 7: #27, 28 ]

8). Why does St. Teresa say that God
      " hid the evil, and revealed some little virtue
        if ...I had any and made it great in the eyes of all,
        so that they always held me in much honour"?
          [ Life: Ch. 7:  #29 ]

9). How did St. Teresa's father derive benefit
       from his own suffering?
         [ Life: Ch. 7:  #24, 20 ]

10). What advice does St. Teresa give
          regarding friendships?
        [ Life: Ch. 7: #32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 ]
________________________________

1a). How did St. Teresa err
           "under the pretence of humility" ?
             [ Life: Ch. 7: #1, 2, 17 ]

St. Teresa said that
  "under the pretence of humility...
I began to be afraid
  of giving myself to prayer,
because I saw myself so lost.

"going...
   - from pastime to pastime,
   - from vanity to vanity,
   - from one occasion of sin to another,
 I began to expose myself exceedingly
   to the very greatest dangers:

 my soul was so distracted by many vanities,
  that I was ashamed to draw near unto God
  in an act of such special friendship
  as that of prayer.
  ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #1 ]

It was the most fearful delusion
  into which Satan could plunge me
to give up prayer
  under the pretence of humility.

I thought it would be better for me,
  seeing...my wickedness ...
not to practise mental prayer
nor commune with God so much;
  for I deserved to be with the devils"
  ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #2 ]

"I had been a year and more
    without praying,
thinking it an act of greater humility
    to abstain.

This...was the greatest temptation
   I ever had,
because it very nearly wrought
  my utter ruin;
  ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #17]
_______________________

1b). Did she think that she deceived others? 
          What was her intention?
            [ Life: Ch. 7: #1, 2, 3 ]

St. Teresa said was concerned
  that her outward behavior would deceive others.

By her "outward show of goodness
  (she said she)... was deceiving those
who were about me"
...[ Life: Ch. 7: #2 ]

"for with my cunning
  I so managed matters,
that all had a good opinion of me;

The reason why
  they thought I was not so wicked was this:
they saw that I...
  - withdrew...often into solitude for prayer,
  - read much,
  - spoke of God...
  - and other things of the same kind in me
    which have the appearance of virtue.

Yet all the while I was so vain
  I knew how to procure respect for myself
by doing those things
  which in the world
are usually regarded with respect.
...[ Life: Ch. 7: #3 ]

What was her intention?

But it was not her intention
  to deceive others or
  to obtain their esteem.

"and yet I did not seek this deliberately
   by simulating devotion;
for in all that relates
   to hypocrisy and ostentation...
I do not remember
   that I ever offended Him,
so far as I know.
 ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #2 ]

It was rather a heavy affliction to me
  that I should be thought so well of;
for I knew my own secret."
...[ Life: Ch. 7: #1 ]

 Feeling "wicked" and unworthy to pray,
   she thought it "better"
 ...to live like the multitude
   to say the prayers
 which I was bound to say,
  and that vocally:
 not to practise mental prayer
 nor commune with God so much"
...[ Life: Ch. 7: #1 ]

May His Majesty grant I may
  undeceive some one of the many
  I led astray when
 - I told them there was no harm in these things, and
 - assured them there was no such great danger therein.

    I did so because I was blind myself;
      for I would not deliberately lead them astray.

 By the bad example I set before them...
   I was the occasion of much evil,
 not thinking I was doing so much harm.
  ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #15 ]
________________________________

2a). What did St. Teresa say
          caused her soul to be
          "injured and dissipated"?
            [ Life: Ch. 7: #1, 2, 10, 12]

St. Teresa said that
  she indulged in worldly conversations
which caused:
   "my soul (to) be injured and dissipated,"

These conversations were distractions
   and "a waste of time"
 which led to abandonment of prayer,
   and temptations / near "occasion of sin".

"...when I began to indulge in these conversations,
  I did not think,
seeing they were customary,
  that my soul must be injured and dissipated,
as I afterwards found it must be,

...by such conversations.
  I did not observe...
that an act which was perilous for me
  was not so perilous for them;

and yet I have no doubt
there was some danger in it,
were it nothing else but a waste of time".
...[ Life: Ch. 7: #10 ]

I spent many years in this pestilent amusement;
 for it never appeared to me,
when I was engaged in it,
 to be so bad as it really was,
though at times I saw clearly
 it was not good.
...[ Life: Ch. 7: #12 ]

"going on
 - from pastime to pastime,
 - from vanity to vanity,
 - from one occasion of sin to another,
 I began to expose myself exceedingly
  to the very greatest dangers"

As my sins multiplied,
 I began to lose the pleasure and comfort
I had in virtuous things:
 and that loss
contributed to the abandonment of prayer.

I see now most clearly, O my Lord,
  that this comfort departed from me
because I had departed from Thee.

I began to expose myself exceedingly
  to the very greatest dangers:

my soul was so distracted by many vanities,
  that I was ashamed to draw near unto God
in an act of such special friendship
  as that of prayer.
...[ Life: Ch. 7: # 1 ]

I began to be afraid of giving myself to prayer,
 because I saw myself so lost.
It was the most fearful delusion
 into which Satan could plunge me

- to give up prayer
     under the pretence of humility.

   I thought it would be better for me,
...seeing...my wickedness...
not to practise mental prayer
  nor commune with God so much;
...for
- I deserved to be with the devils, and
- was deceiving those who were about me,
   because I made an outward show of goodness;
...[ Life: Ch. 7: # 2 ]
______________________________________

2b). What does she say
         she should have been doing?
          [ Life: Ch. 7: #1, 14, 17, 11 ]

St. Teresa said that she should have been
~ avoiding wordly converstaions and pastimes:

  "I beseech them all, for the love of our Lord,
   to flee from such recreations as these"
   ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #14 ]

~ focusing her attention on God:
   --to "draw near unto God
      in an act of such special friendship
      as that of prayer".
       ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #1 ]

   "for, when I used to pray,
       if I offended God one day,
    on the following days
       I would recollect myself,
    and withdraw farther
       from the occasions of sin".
       ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #17 ]

   Our Lord was pleased
    - to show me that these friendships
       were not good for me:
    - to warn me also, and in my blindness,
       which was so great,
    - to give me light.
       ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #11 ]
_______________________________

3). St. Teresa reported that
     "It did me much harm that I did not then know".
3a). What was it that she didn't know ?
            [ Life: Ch. 7: # 12, 11 ]
 
St. Teresa reported that she didn't know
  "that it was possible to see anything
otherwise than with the eyes of the body".
...[ Life: Ch. 7: #12 ]

She is referring to the vision of Christ
  by which she
       "saw Him with the eyes of the soul".

 "Our Lord was pleased

   - to show me that these friendships
          were not good for me:
   - to warn me also, and
      in my blindness, which was so great,
   - to give me light.
   - (gave) me to understand
      what in my conduct was offensive to Him.
           ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #11 ]

3b). How did it cause her "much harm" ?
           [ Life: Ch. 7: # 12 ]

This not knowing
  "that it was possible to see anything
   otherwise than with the eyes of the body"
   brought her harm because:

~ It allowed her to doubt
    and disregard the vision's message:

    "but, as (the message)  was not to my liking,
     I forced myself to lie to myself"

    "and as I did not dare
       to discuss the matter with any one,
    and as great importunity was used,
      I went back to my former conversation
    with the same person, and
      with others also, at different times;

    for I was assured that there was no harm
      in seeing such a person...

   I spent many years in this pestilent amusement;
     for it never appeared to me...
   to be so bad as it really was,
     though at times I saw clearly
   it was not good.
   ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #12 ]

~ This lack of knowledge made her susceptible
      to the devil's deceit
      who tempted her to think that the vision was
      - only her imagination
         or
       - a trick of the devil

     Because she did not know
      "that it was possible to see anything
       otherwise than with the eyes of the body",
     she felt that "Satan too,..helped me to...
         - understand it to be impossible, and
         - suggested that
            --I had imagined the vision
            -- (or) that it might be Satan himself "
                ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #12 ]
________________________________
4). What was the incident of the "great toad
        and its significance?
        [ Life: Ch. 7: #12, 13 ]

St. Teresa saw what looked like a great toad,
    coming toward her and her friend,
moving more swiftly
   than was normal for a toad.

She felt it signified a special meaning or warning
    regarding her behavior,
especially regarding her friendship with someone
    who had a bad influence on her.

"the impression it made on me was such,
  that I think it must have had a meaning;

   neither have I ever forgotten it".

Oh, the greatness of God!
  with what care and tenderness
didst Thou warn me in every way!
  and how little I profited by those warnings!
  ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #13 ]

for I was assured that there was no harm
  in seeing such a person, and that I gained,
instead of losing, reputation by doing so.

I spent many years in this pestilent amusement;
  for it never appeared to me,
when I was engaged in it,
  to be so bad as it really was,
though at times
 I saw clearly it was not good.

But no one caused me the same distraction
 which that person did
of whom I am speaking;
 and that was because
I had a great affection for her.
...[ Life: Ch. 7: #12 ]
__________________________________
5a). What was a temptation for St. Teresa and
         a "most common temptation in beginners" ?
          [ Life: Ch. 7: #16, 21 ]

St. Teresa said that,
"...before I knew
  how to be of use to myself,
I had a very strong desire
  to further the progress of others:
a most common temptation of beginners.
...[ Life: Ch. 7: #16 ]

St. Teresa said that
 "though I was walking in vanity myself,
    ...My father was not the only person
whom I prevailed upon to practise prayer..."

"I always had a desire that others should serve God".

She describes this as
  "the great blindness I was in:
 going to ruin myself,
 and labouring to save others".
...[ Life: Ch. 7: #21 ]
______________________________________

5b). How did she describe her actions
        in regard to this temptation ?
         [ Life: Ch. 7: # 16, 17, 20, 21 ]

Because she had derived great benefits
   from her earlier practice of prayer,
 she wanted her father to also
  experience the benefits of prayer.

She began by providing good books to read and
  "As he was so good,
this exercise took such a hold upon him, 
  that in five or six years...
he made so great a progress"
...[ Life: Ch. 7: #16]

Although she was instrumental in helping her father
  in the practice of prayer,
she later failed to maintained her own prayer habits.

She "had become so dissipated,
  and had ceased to pray..."
  ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #17]

Years later, when she observes his progression,
  "as he had now risen
        to great heights of prayer himself",
she admits that she has neglected
   her own practice of prayer.

   She was "wasting (her time) in other vanities".
    ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #20 ]

When I saw persons fond of reciting their prayers, I
  - showed them how to make a meditation, and
  - helped them and
  - gave them books;
 for from the time I began myself to pray...
  I always had a desire that others should serve God.

I thought, now
  - that I did not, myself, serve our Lord
     according to the light I had,
  - that the knowledge His Majesty had given me
     ought not to be lost, and
  - that others should serve Him for me.

I say this in order to explain
  the great blindness I was in:
going to ruin myself,
  and labouring to save others.
  ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #21 ]
______________________________________
6). Is there any sufficient reason not to pray?
      [ Life: Ch. 7: #19, 24, 20 ]

St. Teresa said that there is not
  any "sufficient reason" not to pray because:
    Prayer only needs:
       - "love and
       - (the formation of) a habit"

"...Our Lord always furnishes an opportunity for it,
    if we but seek it".

Even in sickness or weakness,
  one can offer up the suffering to God
        however briefly, since:

        true prayer consists,
         when the soul loves,
          - in offering up its burden, and
          - in thinking of Him for Whom it suffers...
          - in the resignation of the will, and
          - in a thousand ways which
                then present themselves.
             ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #19 ]

St. Teresa, later, reported
  how her father, made his suffering, a prayer:

Since her father suffered
  with "a most acute pain of the shoulders...
I said to him, that as he had so great a devotion
  to our Lord carrying His cross on His shoulders,
he should now think that
  His Majesty wished him to feel
    somewhat of that pain
    which He then suffered Himself."
    ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #24 ]

"With a little care,
    we may find great blessings
  on those occasions
    when our Lord, by means of afflictions,
  deprives us of time for prayer;
   ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #20]
_______________________________

7a). By means of prayer, what did she learn ?
          [ Life: Ch. 7: #27 ]

 St. Teresa said, "I learned in prayer
     more and more of my faults".
     ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #27 ]
___________________________________

7b). What were the "two contradictions"
          that she endured "without abandoning
             either the one or the other"?
              [ Life: Ch. 7: #27, 28 ]

St. Teresa stated:
- On one side, God was calling me;
- On the other, I was following the world.

It seemed as if I wished
  to reconcile two contradictions,
so much at variance one with another
  as are
     - the life of the spirit and
     - the joys and pleasures
        and amusements of sense.

All the things of God
   gave me great pleasure;
and I was a prisoner
  to the things of the world.
  ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #27 ]

I suffered much in prayer;
  for the spirit
   - was slave, and
   - not master;

She was not able to withdraw alone into solitude
  without "a thousand vanities" accompanying her.

   "I was not able to shut myself up within myself...
    without shutting up with me
         a thousand vanities at the same time".

I spent many years in this way;
  and I am now astonished
that any one could have borne it
 without abandoning
     either the one or the other.
 ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #28 ]
_________________
8). Why does St. Teresa say that God
       "hid the evil, and revealed some little virtue
           if ...I had any
           and made it great in the eyes of all,
        so that they always held me
           in much honour"?
           [ Life: Ch. 7:  #29 ]

St. Teresa felt that God hid her errors in order that
  her errors would not reflect negatively and discredit
the writing (on prayer and her spiritual experiences)
   that she would later be asked to do by her Confessors.

  "The reason is, that He Who knoweth all things
      saw it was necessary it should be so,
   in order that I might have some credit given me
      by those to whom in after years
   I was to speak of His service.

His Supreme Munificence regarded
  - not my great sins,
  - but rather
    -- the desires I frequently had
          to please Him, and
    -- the pain I felt because
          I had not the strength to bring
          those desires to good effect".
           ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #29 ]
_______________________________
9). How did St. Teresa's father derive benefit
       from his own suffering?
        [ Life: Ch. 7:   #24, 20 ]

He offered up his severe shoulder pain to God,
  praying to share in the pain that the Lord suffered
in carrying the Cross on His shoulders.

St. Teresa, described how her father,
    made his suffering, a prayer:
Since her father suffered with
    "a most acute pain of the shoulders...
I said to him, that as he had so great a devotion
    to our Lord carrying His cross on His shoulders,
he should now think that
    His Majesty wished him to feel somewhat of that pain
which He then suffered Himself."

"This so comforted him, that I do not think
   I heard him complain afterwards".
   ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #24]

St. Teresa taught that while in pain
   when one has little strength, concentration,
      or ability to meditate,
   they can unite their suffering with Christ's:

  "With a little care,
    we may find great blessings
          on those occasions
    when our Lord, by means of afflictions,
          deprives us of time for prayer".
           ...[ Life: Ch. 7:  #20]
______________________

10). What advice does St. Teresa give
          regarding friendships?
          [ Life: Ch. 7: #32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 ]

St Teresa stated, " I would advise
  those who give themselves to prayer,
particularly at first,
  - to form friendships; and
  - converse familiarly,
with others, who are doing the same thing.

~ She said this was very important because it will
   - not only "lead...to helping one another by prayer",
   - but also to other benefits. (support, edification)
      ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #33 ]

  "it seems to me that if I had had any one
    with whom I could have spoken of all this,
  it might have helped me not to fall.
  ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #32 ]

  - She stated that
       if people find support
         from wordly conversations,
       how much more benefit will be provided to one,
        "who is beginning to love and serve God in earnest
        (and) to confide to another his joys and sorrows...".
         ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #33 ]

   (He)"...will profit both himself and those who hear him,
    and thus, will derive more light for his own understanding,
     as well as for the instruction of his friends".
     ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #34 ]

~ "It seems to me that Satan has employed this artifice:
    - that men who really wish to love and please God,
        should hide the fact,
        (out of false humility or fear of vain-glory)
    - while others, at his suggestion,
         make open show of their malicious dispositions;
       and this is so common,
         that it seems a matter of boasting now,
       and the offences committed against God
         are thus published abroad.
         ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #35, 34, 37 ]

~ "It is necessary for those who would serve Him
      to join shoulder to shoulder,
     if they are to advance at all"

    "if any one begins to give himself up
        to the service of God,
     there are so many to find fault with him,
       that it becomes necessary
          for him to seek companions,
       in order that he may find protection among them
         till he grows strong enough
         ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #36 ]

~ Regarding True Humility, St. Teresa said:
    "And it is a kind of humility in man
     - not to trust to himself,
     - but to believe that God will help him in his relations
        with those with whom he converses"

~ and charity grows by being diffused;
     (when there is sharing and communication
       of edifying topics).

~ Regarding her own experience:
    "if our Lord had not...given me the opportunity
       of speaking very frequently
            to persons given to prayer,
     I should have gone on falling and rising
        till I tumbled into hell".

    "I had many friends to help me to fall;
        but as to rising again,
     I was so much left to myself"

    "I praise God for His mercy;
        for it was He only
     Who stretched out His hand to me"
      ...[ Life: Ch. 7: #37 ]
_____________________________